Month: June 2017

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2017-02-07 16.25.29

There’s a place far from here
Bigger than the flying sky
Farther than the whispering stars
A long road leads to that lonely place
Passing through the desert
Wading through the forest
Crossing the highest mountains
Alongside a vast grey river
Under the shadows of rusted leaves
There’s a place where I don’t feel alone
It’s a place where I don’t feel lost
A place built of dreams
A place where I feel… Home
And I will be waiting for you
Waiting for you to come Home. . .

 

I’m glad you didn’t love me

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I never loved someone as selflessly
No one told me how to love
Movies taught me a shade of it
A fake shade of it though
They showed me that someone who loves with all their heart
Always finds the one they love
But they never showed me how to stand up
When I had badly fallen in love with the person that doesn’t love me back
Why didn’t they tell you what to do when the only person you have ever loved in your love and the only person you think you’ll ever love doesn’t love you back
So, thank you so much for teaching me something that no movie could ever teach me

I knew that you were the desire of many
I could see in their eyes
I tried to protect you from their filthy disgust
But you were the want of only one
Such a want with which I couldn’t survive
I was hungry for love
Not just any love
But for your love
My love for you was priceless
A love no one has ever seen
I wrote poems after poem on your exquisite beauty which only I could see
Which was visible only to me
Hoping that you’d realize my true love for you
I tried to look you, admire you, turn you into words in every form
I bled when you didn’t even cast a look
Even though you knew someone loved you the most

So when you didn’t love me in spite of me loving you madly
I thought there was something wrong with me, I really did
I tried to beat myself up over it
To find out what was wrong with me
I still remember those hollow nights
With air full of haunting thoughts
And suicidal urges

There was nothing wrong with me. I realized
Because It wasn’t you that I loved
It was me
It was me all along
That I loved
When I was with you
I missed myself more than you
I showed myself that part of me that I never knew existed
And all along I thought it was you
A part that I loved the most.
It wasn’t me that wasn’t worthy of your love
It was you.

I will love again
I will find someone again
Someone might be just like you
I will fall deeper in love again
I thought I wouldn’t survive without your love
But I did survive
I’m still alive
I’m still breathing
I’m glad you didn’t love me

The Locked Door

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I fell in love with her even before she entered the room. I saw a reflection of her through the window of the room. That one glance, that one second was the moment of forever of my life. As she entered the room, I was completely immobilized. I felt like I was waiting for this moment since my whole life. My whole life has come to this precise moment. My heart beat began to rise. I was afraid that she might hear. She might hear what my heart was telling her. My heart was betraying me. My heart loved her more than I ever did. I felt happy and sad at the same time: she didn’t know how much I loved her, and she never will as I waited too long to tell her what I felt.

She was flawless in every way. Flawless in the way the wind played with her hair, flawless in the way the sun shone in her eyes, and flawless in the way her whole face illuminated when the sun casts its beauty on the moon of my life. She was the storm and I was just a boy who was so terrified to swim in its waves. She was the rose and I was just a boy who never paid heed to its thorns. She was that bright star of my life that every step, every path of mine led to her. She didn’t know that and she never will as I waited too long.

Suddenly, the door opened and floods of darkness fell over me. The security guard was terrified to see me sitting in the classroom so late in the night, alone. He was asking me something, there was a look of anger and fear in his eyes but I just walked out of the room and never looked back.

Time

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I didn’t know what I was looking for until
You walked into the room of my heart
And stole it from the core.
You are always there in the back of my mind
You are the subject of my every thought.
I want to drink the wine of your love
The heaven of your eyes
Your carefree laugh whispers to me in my lonely nights
Those dimples makes me forgets all the sorrows
Your chaste lips casts a spell on my hazy lips
Your mere look eases me out of this ecstasy.
Now you’re all I want
You are my only wish
You are my only desire
I whisper your name in my every breath
In my every dream

There’s nothing I’d do than
To hold you in my arms
Look in your hazy eyes
Feel your warm breath on my neck
Kiss your parted lips, and
Forget everything about the world
Of reality and dreams
And a thousand times over
Fall in love with you
All over again